Watching Sitcoms

So, what am I watching now? I thought I’d make a list, cause I’m getting a little confused myself. Especially cause it seems like shows are ending and starting all randomly every week. Here’s my rundown (all times are ET):

Monday
The Big Bang Theory - CBS - 8:00 pm
New Amsterdam - FOX - 9:00 pm
The Bachelor: London Calling - ABC - 10 pm

Tuesday
American Idol - FOX - 8 pm
Beauty and the Geek - CW - 8 pm
Reaper - CW - 9 pm

Wednesday
America’s Next Top Model - CW - 8 pm
American Idol - FOX - 9 pm

Thursday
Miss Guided - ABC - 8 pm
Lost - ABC - 9 pm
Smallville - CW - 8 pm
Supernatural- CW - 9 pm

Saturday
Torchwood - BBC America - 9 pm

That’s about 12 1/2 hours per week. That’s not too bad, is it? But, wow, that’s a heck of a lot more reality TV than I realized. And this Tuesday night (April 1) is the start of Hell’s Kitchen on Fox at 9:00 pm ET, following American Idol. That will be at least 6 hours of reality TV a week. I say “at least” because both American Idol and The Bachelor are sometimes longer than an hour.

Of my TV watching time, only an hour and a half is devoted to sitcoms. But, at least its 5 hours is on the CW, and since I write the watchingcw.com blog, too, I feel reassured by that.

Also returning soon are some other shows I’ll be watching, like House, Bones and Law and Order: SVU. Which puts me at a total of 15 1/2 hours per week. That’s not too bad, only a little over 2 hours a day. Of course, that’s only prime time, and it doesn’t take into consideration my regular daily routine while making, eating and cleaning up dinner, from around 5 pm to 8 pm. Then I usually watch, in this order: Everybody Loves Raymond, Everybody Loves Raymond, Judge Judy, 30 Minute Meals, Judge Judy, and Jeopardy. So that’s another possible 3 hours per day. But who’s counting?

Miss Guided was still pretty cute last week. I’m not saying its my favorite show or anything, but each week I find myself remembering to DVR it.

Last Thursday there was an episode, “Rebel Yell,” where Becky decides she has to learn to live it up a little more, and so she joins with Lisa and Tim, to prank Bruce, the Vice Principal. They start out in the kitchen eating pizza and drinking beer, and when Bruce comes to investigate, they run. It turns into this whole Breakfast Club music video bit, where they dance, in sync, through doorways and other stuff like that. For me, at least, it was just pretty funny. Of course, Becky being the more socially awkward, ends up trashing Bruce’s office, all on her own, and gets caught on a surveillance camera video that Bruce has set up.

The other episode dealt with Becky and Lisa having to plan a retirement party for the meanest, nastiest, most hated teacher at the school, Mrs. Pool, who is secretly blackmailing almost everyone. Becky is the only one who gets up the nerve to tell her off, with fairly drastic results.

Miss Guided airs it’s last two first season episodes this Thursday, April 3, at 8 pm and 8:30 pm ET on ABC, and it has not yet been renewed for a second season. But I hope it sticks around, because its nice to see a comedy that’s more about being funny, and less about being rude.

Remember, if you’ve missed them, you can still watch the full episodes at the website, here.

The American Idol Top 10 are about to be the American Idol Top 9.

I’d rather not have any surprises tonight, but then what I want is rarely taken into consideration. Besides everybody seems to like somebody in this group. There don’t appear to be any Sanjayas or John Stevenses, who have a small fan base and a huge hate base.

Once again, this week, I am thankful that I’ve DVRd the show, so I can fast forward through stuff like the song writing competition. I almost fast forward through the big group sing, but I’m a masochist and I force myself to listen. And watch. It’s always so awkward, like they just met backstage a few minutes ago, someone told them the name of the song they were singing, and sent them out there. As it turns out, it wasn’t worth watching at all, cause not one of the guys sang. If it was my call, I’d get rid of all the girls and just let the guys finish up this competition.

Question: Does Carly ever wear a shirt with sleeves? Does she own any?

I completely fast forwarded through the recap to get the the results. *deep breath*

Here we go. First up is Chikezie. He is in the Bottom 3.

Next is Brooke. She is safe.

Carly is also safe.

Next follows what might possibly be the first cool looking Ford commercial in the history of American Idol.

Back to the results and next is David A. He is safe.

Then David Cook who is also safe.

Syesha is in the Bottom 3.

Michael is safe.

Squeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!!!!!! Constantine in the audience. Wait, did I just do that out loud?

Hang on, I have to fast forward through the stupid audience questions. (And be aassured, both the audience and the questions are stupid.)

I am gonna watch the stuff about Kimberly Locke, cause I always liked her.

Ryan is naming off the stars who will be here for Idol Gives Back. My husband asks, “Aren’t those the Hollywood Squares?” I then fast forwarded through the rest of it.

Back to the results:

Ramiele is next. She should be in the Bottom 3. But she is safe. Who votes for this kid?

Jason and Kristy come out next. Kristy is safe and Jason is in the Bottom 3.

This is not the right Bottom 3.

Jason is safe!!!!! Yay!!! I can breathe again.

Syesha is safe and Chikezie is gone. I’m gonna miss him, but even more, I’m gonna miss his mother.

Usually, I mark down who I think is going out in what order on American Idol when we get to the Top 12. I didn’t do that this year, cause this group is, overall, so bad (even if they seem to have the most prior experience and recording contracts than any other season) and several of them are being so pimped, I have no idea how its all gonna go down.

I guess I will try to do it with the Top 10. After I hear them sing this week. I guess this week is songs from the year they were born, so it will be pretty much like 80’s week again. Which is OK with me, cause the 80’s are my favorite. I’ve seen the spoilers for what they will be singing, and there aren’t too many surprises there. As a matter of fact, a friend of mine and I were trying to guess what people would sing, and after seven years of this show, you just know there are certain songs they are gonna do. We got two of them matched up, the right songs with the right singers. Well, I was excited anyway.

So this week, since we are up to the Top 10, the people we are going to be paying money to see and hear at the concert, I will try to give them an actual mark or grade as they sing, along with my candid comments, which I know bring so much joy to others.

Ramiele Malubay - Alone, Heart (1987). Apparently, they are throwing her to the curb by making her sing first, when she’s already so lucky to be still be here. How she expects this song to hold up against the best it was ever done on this show, by Carrie Underwood, I don’t know. There were some definite bad notes in there and she just doesn’t seem to connect with the song or the audience. She’s gotta go. Grade: D-

Jason Castro - Fragile, Sting (1987). March 25th, hmmm, today is his 21st birthday. He does have beautiful eyes and yet he is so dorky. Jason just seems so comfortable behind the guitar, you know its his thing. Plus, a little Spanish for us this week, huh? That is a great song and, in my opinion, he did a good job with it. I agree with Paula, he is true to who he is. You know who also did that, Ruben Studdard and Chris Daughtry. They were themselves every week and look where they ended up. Grade: B+

Syesha Mercado - If I Were Your Woman, Stephanie Mills (1987). I wish she would never do that baby cry again. Ever. Syesha’s another one who does the same thing every week. But will the judges call her on it? If you ask me, she completely oversings everything. Amanda was right, ballads are boring. Now, my husband just said “that’s beautiful,” so maybe it’s all a matter of opinion. My mom just called to tell me how wonderful she thought it was, too. Grade: B- (mostly cause everyone else liked it.)

Chikezie - If Only For One Night, Luther Vandross (1985). I’m forced to say each week how much I hate those people in the front randomly swaying, arms in the air, out of sync with the music. I hate, hate, hate them. It completely distracts me from the singing. OK, I closed my eyes so I can just listen. He’s really good this week and its surprising to me how he’s good singing both slow and fast. My husband’s comment, “that was excellent.” And I have to agree. It was smart of him to keep his mouth shut and not argue with Simon, too, cause that could only hurt him. Grade: B+

Brooke White - Every Breath You Take, The Police (1983). Oooh, straight hair. Oooh, false start?? What was that about? I guess this show really is live. She must have started in the wrong key. Deciding to start acapella probably wasn’t a good idea. I like her better than last week, but it’s just not a good version of that song, which is one of my favorites. She’s getting kinda boring for me. Grade: C

Michael Johns - We Are the Champions, Queen (1978). He was a little cutie, wasn’t he? Apparently, he had a bad temper though, throwing tables. Wow, he did great!! This is the Michael Johns we used to know and love back during Hollywood week. I actually liked him tonight and that hasn’t happened since he hit the Top 24, I think. He was the best of the night so far for me. (And apparently for Simon, who said basically the same thing just after I typed that.) Grade: A

Carly Smithson - Total Eclipse of the Heart, Bonnie Tyler (1983). Something happened to my sound when her mom was talking, so I don’t know how she got her name.

Then my screen went blank for a while. When it came back on, Simon was telling David Archuleta what a bad job he did. (David Archuleta - You’re the Voice, David Foster with Jeff Pescetto (1990).)

I wonder if the good people at Fox know that the half the Eastern seaboard apparently didn’t get to hear Carly and David and if that means we’ll have to do this show over tomorrow. I sincerely hope not. Well, I don’t how many people really lost the show, but I know that my phone was ringing with people trying to figure out if it was just them.

Honestly, as it turns out, I don’t care much about Carly or David A., so I’m OK. No matter what they did I wasn’t gonna like it. I wouldn’t have graded them above C-, so there you have it.

Kristy Lee Cook - God Bless the USA, Lee Greenwood (1984). She may no longer annoy her family when she sings, but she’s bugging the heck outta me. This song was written back in 1984? Well, I’ve always hated country music, so maybe I just wasn’t paying attention. It was a smart choice for her, cause its country and its about God and the USA, so she’s probably safe this week. Personally, I hated it, but I just don’t care for her sound. Paula said she’s heard better from Kristy? Where was I? Kristy should have been gone this week, but now we’ll have to listen to her sing at least once again. Grade: F

David Cook - Billie Jean, Michael Jackson (1983). I know I’ve heard this version before. I remember thinking, what song is that? But I like it. Stuff like this always makes David Cook seem like he’s being so original. Which is a good thing, cause that sounded like I was dissing him. I wasn’t. He’s just really good. He’s almost even starting to look cute to me. I think he just got bumped up to my best of the night. Grade: A+

After listening to Carly and David A. in the recap, I’m even more certain I wouldn’t have liked them.

So, I think the bottom three will be Ramiele, Syesha and Brooke. Or it should be anyway. And Ramiele should leave us.

This is my order for people to leave, keep in mind this isn’t necessarily what I want, just what I think will happen:
10. Ramiele
9. Kristy
8. Chikezie
7. Brooke
6. Michael
5. Jason
4. Syesha
3. Carly
2. David C.
1. David A.

I watched a couple eps of Miss Guided last Thursday. It was actually two episodes back to back which aired on ABC before Lost last week. They are doing the same thing this week, two back to back episodes, starting at 8:00 pm ET.

I don’t know what I thought this show would be like, but it was actually kinda cute. Becky Freeley (played by Judy Greer), was a gawky, insecure high school student (weren’t we all?). She has now returned to her alma mater as a guidance counselor hoping to have finally overcome her awkward, traumatic high school experiences.

Also on staff is Tim (played by Kristoffer Polaha), a school mechanic who has been recruited into a position as the substitute Spanish teacher. It’s clear that Becky is in love with Tim, but unfortunately, although he treats her as a friend, he seems unaware of her attraction to him. Also, unfortunately, the hot new English teacher, Lisa Germain (played by Brooke Burns), is her past high school nemesis, and it forces Becky to relive her high school neurosis, as well as giving her a rival for Tim’s affections. Miss Guided also stars Earl Billings as Principal Huffy and Chris Parnell as Vice Principal Bruce Terry.

One episode, “Hot Sub” was about a new substitute Spanish teacher (played by Ashton Kutcher, an Executive Producer of the show), that Becky is determined not to like, because it appears that he will be replacing Tim, forcing him back to his position as school auto shop teacher. Ashton’s character is universally liked at the school, because of his laid back, friendly persona, and his ability to connect so easily with both faculty and student. However, then he makes it clear that he prefers Becky to Lisa.

The other ep, “The List” was about their school’s gossip website and Becky’s crazy machinations to move up on the hottest teacher list.

You can see the the full eps at the ABC website. Also, you might want to check it out this Thursday.

Who will make the Top 10? This is American Idol. And this is my choppy, cut and chop night review. I’ll be fast-forwarding through stuff again this week. Cause I can. Oh, no, are they doing that songwriter thing again? Why do they do that? It’s almost like they hate us.

Also, I think they should avoid the big group sings with this crowd. These people are too awkward and dissimilar to sing together. Question: Was Ramiele’s mic even on? And why didn’t David C, Jason and Ramiele get to sing solo at all?

I’m even more anti-recap this week than I am other weeks, cause last night’s performances are not something I want to have to sit through twice.

So on to eliminations.

First up is Brooke. She is safe.

Carly is next. She is in the Bottom Three!! Yay! I never expected that.

Next up is David A. He is safe. (Wow, what a surprise.)

Michael is safe!

Now we’re showing the Ford commercial - but the fun part is we get to see how it’s made. So how cold was it in Hollywood when they did that commercial? I mean how cold does it really get there?

Back to eliminations.

David C. is next and he is safe.

Kristy Lee is . . . once again in the Bottom Three.

Jason is safe!!!! Yipee! I get to see him on the tour.

Ramiele is next and she is safe. Wow, everything I thought is being blown out of the water, isn’t it.

Then they did the silly audience questions. I’m just fast-forwarding through these, thanks to DVR. Ditto to Kelly Pickler. And the Idol Gives Back stuff.

Back to eliminations.

Syesha is safe.

So all that’s left is Chikezie and Amanda. Chikezie is safe and Amanda is in the Bottom Three.

I knew it would be a girl. Could this show be more scripted?

Carly is sent to the couches first. She is safe. Oh well, you can’t win them all.

Please let it be Kristy. Please let it be Kristy. Please let it be Kristy. *sigh*

I’ll miss you, Amanda.

So here we are with the American Idol Top 11 waiting to hear them kill off a few more Beatles songs. Yay us. All week, I’d been wishing they weren’t doing this, cause I was certain it would be bad. If I actually realized that it would, or even could, be worse than last week, I wouldn’t have believed it. But you can believe it.

In any case, I’m kinda bored about all the beginning stuff, so I didn’t pay too much attention tonight. Plus, my mom wouldn’t stop talking about stuff. Mostly it was about Simon who was on Oprah and he gave someone money for something. I’ve heard the story a couple of times now, but I don’t care. Plus, she has a way of making a short story long. I did note that Ryan’s neck is looking a bit thick tonight. Is he gaining weight? Working out?

Also, I don’t make mention of any one’s memorable moments or whatever, cause they were all stupid.

So here’s my take:

Amanda - Back in the USSR (The Beatles, commonly referred to as The White Album, 1968). When she talks, she seems so normal. Then she sings. This wasn’t as good as last week especially since she spoke, rather than attempting to sing, most of the song. Her ending almost seemed like it was gonna be the kick, then it wasn’t. Overall, she was OK, but not good. She did sorta look good. Ish.

Paula says they look for people in this competition to be who they are? Then why make them sing karaoke to 40 year old songs that many of them have never even heard before? Just asking.

Can I just say right here, I hate those people standing in the front? Why, for the love of Pete, do they wave their arms so annoyingly? What, if anything, can be done about them?

Kristy - You’ve Got To Hide Your Love Away (Help!, 1965). While she sounded better this week than last, it’s obvious that she didn’t know the song, because the emphasis was in all the wrong places and she clearly changed the melody. Plus, I hate when they talk back to Simon. She says some people liked that mess last week? Who are these people? What drugs are they taking? Anyway, she’s cute so I’d say she’ll make Top 10, cause they will want her as a draw on the tour. I hope I’m wrong.

David A. - The Long And Winding Road (Let It Be, 1970). Clearly, the kid can sing. I couldn’t help feeling, however, as he sang, that if Kevin Covais had looked less like Chicken Little, he would have made it much farther in the competition. In any case, its obvious that Little David will be around for the long haul. I’ll just have to get used to the sucky breaths (hey, I did it with Jordin Sparks) and lip licking. And all the little screamy girls.

Laura’s comment “I actually like this line up. We’re getting some of the boring people out of the way first.” Oh, and thanks for all the product placement guys - buy an iPhone, go to iTunes, drink Coke.

Michael - A Day in the Life (Sgt. Pepper’s Lonely Hearts Club Band, 1967). A little weak on the high notes, but with his accent, he sounds right singing these songs. I didn’t like the cut and chop he had to do on the song, but that wasn’t his fault. He seems to pick the weirder songs for some reason, but it was OK. Apparently, I liked it better than the judges did. Of course, he gets the sympathy vote cause of his dead friend, so maybe that’s what he needs this week.

Brooke - Here Comes the Sun (Abbey Road, 1969). Um. I didn’t care for that too much. It was kinda boring and predictable and her voice didn’t sound too good. Her dress was kinda cute if you’re living in the 70’s. Regardless, Brooke will be around for a while.

David C. - Day Tripper (flip side of We Can Work It Out, 1965). Well, that was a first. Peter Frampton came alive on the Idol stage. I’m amazed by this guy. This gives the lie to Brooke’s excuses that she wasn’t as good this week because she was too good last week. I think David was equally good both weeks. I usually agree with Simon, but I don’t think he was right about David this week. Either way, David is not going anywhere.

Carly - Blackbird (The Beatles, 1968). I love this song and I hate that she’s doing it. Just so you know before we get started. No, wait, I can’t even comment on this, cause I just don’t like Carly. I’m sorry. Also, she talks back too much. Who cares what she thinks anyway? I’m kinda hoping that the 7 she had tatooed on her fingers will mean that she’s voted off in position 7. I’d only have to avoid listening to her four more times that way.

Jason - Michelle (Rubber Soul, 1965). Ma belle . . . it’s not English? He’s so adorable. I can’t get past that. Did he sing? Oh, right. I thought it was done charmingly and he learned French for it. Maybe it wasn’t his best, but I think he’s consistently himself and I like that.

Syesha - Yesterday (Help!, 1965). Weak start. And have I mentioned how much I hate when they change pronouns - she to he, man to girl? To me it’s just distracting. Tonight, Syesha thinks she’s Fantasia singing Summertime. She’s not. It was overall OK, but I thought it wasn’t that great. She was reaching for the high notes and her voice faded away at times. Obviously, the judges want her to stay, cause I just didn’t think she was that hot.

Chikezie - I’ve Just Seen A Face (Help!, 1965). I’m not sure what I think. At first I was disappointed that he was doing a slow version, but then he speeded it up and I realized that the slow part sounded better vocally. I’m not sure he needed the harmonica thing, but whatever. I think he’s safe this week anyway.

Ramiele - I Should Have Known Better (A Hard Day’s Night, 1964). She wasn’t boring. But I didn’t like it that much either. I guess she was technically good, but something was missing. Plus, I hated those pants she had on. Who dresses these people anyway? She may be in the pimp spot, but I don’t think it can save her. Odds are a girl is going this week, so it’s probably gonna be Ramiele. Too bad it won’t be Kristy.

This entire show was such a mess, it’s hard to pick who I thought was good or bad. No one was really that good.

If we just base this on what I want, Kristy would be going home this week, after being in the bottom three with Ramiele and Amanda.

My top three would be David Cook, Jason and Michael. But I’m prejudiced.

The Return of Jezebel James aired it’s first two episodes back to back on Friday, March 14 on Fox. I watched it, both eps.

Parker Posey is Sarah, a single woman who’s long-term relationship recently ended, and who is presently in a not serious relationship with a man named Marcus (Scott Cohen) that is just about “nice dinners, fancy drinks and sex.” Sarah wants to have a baby before it’s too late, so she decides to go for artificial insemination. However, she finds out that she cannot get pregnant so she contacts her sister, Coco. Sarah is a successful, upbeat editor of children’s books. Her sister Coco is basically a loser who is crashing on a friend’s couch. The two really have no relationship, so when Sarah asks Coco to move in with her and to carry her child, Coco is a little unreceptive.

Parker plays the part of Sarah a bit over the edge for me; she’s just kinda hyper. Coco, played by Lauren Ambrose, seems pretty angry. Their parents (Dianne Wiest and Ron McLarty) are very dysfunctional. I think I liked them better than the two leads. One thing I liked was Sarah’s assistant, Buddy (Michael Arden), because he somehow reminds me of Ianto (Gareth David-Lloyd) from Torchwood, and that’s a good, cause I love Ianto.

So where does Jezebel James come into this? She was Coco’s an imaginary friend when she was little and Sarah hired someone to write a series of books for her about Jezebel.

I’m not sure how this will all come together to spell funny, the first two eps really weren’t. But, you know, if I’m sitting around on Friday with nothing to do, I might watch it again. Honestly, I think the fact that Fox put this show in the Friday night spot of death (I can name off a list of shows that died in that very spot) means that they want to kill it off.

Oh, more importantly, don’t forget the return of The Big Bang Theory tonight on CBS at 8:00 pm ET.

I just found something new online. It’s a site called Hulu.com and it has lots of tv shows and movies that you can watch for free. Some are just clips, but there are lots of full episodes and full movies on the site. And not just new stuff, either.

For example, I just watched an old episode of Barney Miller and really enjoyed it. I used to love this show and it was fun to see an ep from back when. I’ve considered buying the DVDs, but never did because I knew I’d probably just watch them once. Now, I don’t need to spend that money, I can just watch them on Hulu. Now, not all the eps from all the seasons are there, but still there were several to choose from and that was good enough for me.

The episode I watched, The Ghost, was from the third season and starred a recurring character that I remember well from the series. His name is Kenneth Tigar and he played various crazies in several episodes over the course of the show. I remember one episode he was in where he said he was a werewolf and the way they played it, you almost believed it yourself. In The Ghost, he plays a man who claims he is haunted by the ghost of an ancestor and suddenly strange things start happening at the precinct. Very funny.

In all honesty, for years I believed that the guy who played those roles was Sam Anderson, who presently plays Bernard on Lost and also had a recurring role on Angel. The two actors do look something alike and I never thought to look it up. So, see, I learned two things this week. Apparently, you are never too old to learn.

So go check out Hulu.com. It only takes a moment to register and the site is free, so enjoy!

The American Idol Top 12 is about to become the Top 11.

The entire Jim Carrey thing was embarrassing. At least I was embarrassed. Oh, and lucky us, we get to hear this group kill off a few more Lennon/McCartney songs next week. Whoopie!

This is the best Top 12 ever? Are we grading on a curve?? They didn’t really blend at all and the whole group sing thing seemed kinda awkward and uncomfortable. It was like they didn’t even know the songs and hadn’t actually rehearsed together. Ooh, quick glimpse of Sanjaya in the audience. I hope that isn’t the highlight of the night.

Recap of yesterday, pointless as always. One good thing about DVRing the ep and watching it that way is that I can fast forward through the recap.

So now we are about to pick our Bottom Three.

First up, Carly, Michael, Jason and Syesha. Carly is safe, Michael is safe, Jason is safe, Syesha is not. She is the first in the Bottom 3. She gets to sing for us one more time. Did they do this last year? I mean, have then sing when they hit the Bottom 3 instead of when they are voted off?

I was so busy fast forwarding, I almost missed the Ford commercial. I didn’t like it. There wasn’t enough Jason for one thing.

So they got to meet Jim Carrey and see Horton. Good for them. Their lives are changing and getting so much better. Blah, blah, blah.

Back to the results. Chickezie, Amanda, Kristy and David Cook. Chikezie is safe. Amanda is safe. David Cook is safe. Kristy asks “where is my microphone,” so she already knew she deserved to be in the Bottom 3. Ryan thinks this song is fun? What has he been smoking? There’s Sanjaya again!!!

This year, the audience gets to call in with questions. Paige has a question for Jason. I have one for him, too. Are you free later? He’s so incredibly goofy and cute. The rest of the questions are so ridiculous that I just fast forwarded through them and moved on with my life.

Now we have David Foster and Katharine McPhee performing Something. I always thought there was something creepy going on between these two in their year. Yuck. Anyway, I don’t like her and I never did, so I fast forwarded through that, too.

So is Jim Carrey in a movie?

Last up, David A, David H, Brooke and Ramiele. David A is safe. Brooke is safe. (Brooke has a husband?) Ramiele and David H are last. Ramiele is safe and David H is the last in the Bottom 3.

So now we have to listen to him sing again. Well, you did, I fast forwarded.

So we have Syesha, Kristy and David H. in the Bottom 3. Who is safe, who goes home?

Paula never saw a stronger bottom 3? What about in Season 3 when Fantasia, Jennifer Hudson and Latoya London were all in the Bottom 3? That’s the question I want to call in and ask. Do they really think if they keep saying this is the best group ever, it will eventually be true. Cause it won’t.

Syesha is safe. Kristy is safe.

David Hernandez is out. I did say he would never make the tour. I was right.

So its time for the Top 12 on American Idol to desecrate the Lennon/McCartney songbook. Lucky us.

The new set looks really nice. Hopefully, the singing will be up to it. Ryan also looks really nice.

So let’s get started:

Syesha - She tells us a bit about her life and her past and how she listened to oldies when she was younger. Really? You did? How surprising. Got To Get You Into My Life (Revolver 1966) She started out weak in my opinion. And pretty much stayed weak. Sorry, but this wasn’t a good start to the night. Even the judges didn’t like it. This may be the last time we hear her. Also, what is she wearing, cause I don’t like it.

Chikezie - Chats with Ryan. He is dressed like he’s a Blake Lewis golfer, only with real jeans instead of pants he made himself. He is telling us why he should have gone home instead of Danny. He also tells us he only knows Nigerian music. She’s a Woman (the B-side to I Feel Fine, 1964). Great job!! He started it out like a country blue grass jam, and then the band kicked in, and wow! Who knew he had it in him?? He really brought it tonight; he worked the stage and the song. I think he’s the best of the night.

Ramiele - What does she have to tell us? She smells like soy sauce. She and her sister sing. Boy, is her life dull. In My Life (Rubber Soul, 1965). She has a beautiful voice and she’s sounding lovely, but dull. Where’s the wow? She’s never done anything fast or exciting yet on this show, has she? Plus, I want to brush that little bit of hair out of her eyes all the time. She should really start worrying.

Oh, and I don’t care for the AI new logo. Just so you know.

Jason - He tells us that failed his music class. But he does seem to be learning to talk a little better. Maybe. And what an adorable little kid he was! If I Fell (A Hard Day’s Night, 1964). Back with the guitar, yay!! I love the little faces he makes, too! He did a great job. Even though it was also slow, it wasn’t dull. The falsetto is really nice, I think, and the little tune changes made it interesting.

Carly - Chatting with Ryan. She tells us about her move into the apartment she’s sharing with Amanda. She misses Ireland and, if you ask me, she can go back there. Why is her accent so pronounced this week, I wonder? Come Together (Abbey Road, 1969). So where was the wow? She just sang it as far as I’m concerned. Why do the judges like this chick so much? Do they want another winner who can’t sell CDs? I’m sorry, but I really don’t like her and she doesn’t get any passes with me. Don’t the judges realize that when the continually pimp someone who doesn’t deserve it, it pisses people off. Well, me anyway.

David C. - He was a bartender from a little town somewhere. OK, then. Eleanor Rigby (Revolver, 1966). I wanted him to be really great, but that was, apparently, last week for everyone except Chikezie. Also he sang a wrong word cause Father MacKenzie was “darning” his socks, not “wearing” them. The verses were a little weak, although he picked it up a bit on the chorus. I wish it was better. It’s almost like Randy is reading my words as I type them, cause he basically just said the same thing. But tell me, what is with the judges overpraising people this week?

Brooke - She moved to LA to work on music, but instead worked as a nanny. What was that about? Let It Be (Let It Be, 1970) That was really good. Not fast, not exciting, but not dull. She just sounds like she’s singing. You know, not just performing, but just loving the song and singing it. Good for her.

Question: What’s the deal with Ryan and women’s shoes?

David H. - He tells us he got fired from a server job. He doesn’t mention anything about it’s being at a gay strip club. I Saw Her Standing There (Please, Please Me, 1963) This is one of my favorite Beatles songs, but it sounded like it was too low for him in spots and too high in others. He also seemed to have a breath issue. I didn’t care for his arrangement either. It just didn’t stand up well against the original. He needed to make it even more different all around or just go for broke and keep it the same. In which case, he’d need to sing it well. He should also worry, cause he might be getting fired again.

Amanda - Chats with Ryan about what’s happening behind the scenes. She’s a small town nurse on a Harley. But we knew all that. You Can’t Do That (B-side of Can’t Buy Me Love, 1964) Her hair looks really nice this week. If I can’t say anything else nice, at least I said that. Well, no need for the hair comment, cause she did great. It sounded like she was performing it for us in a bar somewhere. And I’m so happy that she didn’t change the pronouns from boy to girl or whatever, cause that would have sucked. One thing that worries me is that she’s a good in a live performance, like Taylor Hicks, and we all know how many albums he sold (or didn’t sell).

Michael - He’s from Australia. He’s a tennis coach. OK. Across the Universe (1969). I still love his accent, but so far he hasn’t wowed me. Please, Michael, wow me tonight. OK, while he didn’t actually bring wow, it was a really solid performance and I think it was the best I’ve heard from him since Hollywood week. It wasn’t screamy, like he has been over the past few weeks. I disagree with Randy and Simon entirely.

Kristy Lee - Oh, you’re a country girl, really? Eight Days a Week (Beatles for Sale, 1964) I hated it. It was too country, kinda boring and busy at the same time, plus the band behind her was way too big for her voice. Please, please, please tell me that she’s going home this week.

Paula, stop talking. You can believe that each one of them can come back next week, but in honesty, one of them isn’t coming back. Deal with it.

David A. - Color me surprised, but *GASP* David is in the pimp spot. I was busy looking something up when he was talking, so I don’t know what he said. And I don’t care. We Can Work It Out (double A-side of Day Tripper, 1963) He forgot the words!!!!!!! It gave me such a huge happy. My mother said to give him a pass because he said he was nervous, and I quote, “He doesn’t know this music, he’s only 10 years old.” He definitely pulled it together for the middle to the end. But you don’t get a pass on this show for forgetting the lyrics and if the judges give him one then I know this show is rigged. It was way not his best performance. I was gonna count all the times he gasped and licked his lips, but the forgetting the words thing took precedence for me and I didn’t. Why did Simon feel it necessary to qualify his rude (and truthful) remarks to David by saying he had to treat everyone the same. Why wouldn’t you, Simon, is David A. special in some way? Oh, right, he’s the one you’re pimping to win this. Sorry about tonight then.

I guess I’ll mark them as Top, Middle and Bottom from this week forward. My Top Three are Chikezie, Brooke and Amanda, probably in that order. The fourth spot would be a split between Jason, Michael and David C. So that would put Ramiele in seventh, David A in eighth and Carly in ninth.

My Bottom Three are Kristy Lee, Syesha and David H. I’d like to see the end of Kristy Lee, please. The other two can live to sing another day.

Welcome To The Captain. Did you see it when it was on? (Monday nights at 8:30 pm ET on CBS) Yeah, me neither. Which makes it a good thing that you can watch the eps online. What did we ever do before the Internet?

Josh Flug, played by Fran Kranz, is a Hollywood filmmaker. When he is not as successful as he’d hoped, he decides to move back to New York City thinking it will give him a fresh vision. Instead, his friend, Marty Tanner (Chris Klein), slightly sleazy accountant to the stars, convinces Josh to move into an old Hollywood apartment building, El Capitan, where an apartment has just become available. Once Josh meets some of the other strange characters also living there, “Uncle” Saul (Jeffrey Tambor), who was a writer on “a little show called Three’s Company,” Charlene Van Ness (Raquel Welch), an over-sexed, older actress bombshell, Astrid (Valerie Aslynn), an aspiring actress who puts an “S” in front of words that don’t require it, and Jesus (Al Madrigal), the front desk man and building snoop, he is ready to call it quits. But then he sees Hope (Joanna Garcia), a failing student acupuncturist, and falls in love, so he decides to stay.

The show was a mid-season replacement, which was given the go-ahead for six episodes. They aired only five and the last four are available to watch at the website. I managed to catch it before last week, so the pilot ep was still up. Its gone now, but this isn’t Royal Shakespeare or anything, so you can watch the eps in any order and just jump in where ever you want. This is definitely light watching, nothing deep or important happens, but the stories are interesting and silly, without being stupid, and the actors are fun and engaging. Which most likely means its going to be cancelled. I can’t find anything that says either way if it’s coming back or not, but I hope it does. Either way, you can check it out for yourself.

The only thing was it wouldn’t let me make the online video into a full screen and it was annoying watching such a small screen. (It looks like that’s OK now, though.) Other than that, I’ve really enjoyed watching the show. Most of the reviews I’ve read are a bit mixed. But that’s why I never care what the reviewers say.

So it’s on to the cut and chops tonight, and we find out who the American Idol Top 12 are for this year.

I’m a little sick about the Lennon/McCartney thing, and I wish they wouldn’t keep mentioning it. Especially not when I’ve just eaten.

First up we have Blake Lewis singing, How Many Words. I liked him better when he was on Idol. Maybe its just that I don’t like the song that he (or whoever) wrote. It just sounded kinda boring and dull to me. Oh, wait, he’s not being judged anymore. Of course, this proves that one does not have to win Idol to sell albums. People will buy anything. Question: Has Blake been watching this year? And he thinks the judges critique has been good? Another question: What is that hat Paula is wearing???

Oh, and how come there was no big group sing this week? Not that I wanted them to, I’m just wondering.

As I sit here waiting to see who is in and who is out, I realize that it doesn’t really matter. No matter who is in and who is out, I’ll keep watching. I’ll sit here every week watching these random strangers, who have become so familiar, as they sing karaoke and are berated by these rarely, if ever, coherent judges. And I’ll like it.

As like last week, I can live without the recap, since I already had to live through the show once. It would be so much easier for them to just tell us who is out and get it over with. But I’m sure there isn’t enough commercial time in a show like that.

So the first safe guy is David Cook. He is followed by David Archuleta. Why does Ryan want me to get crazy over Jason every time??? Yay! Jason is the third guy in the Top 12.

Now time for the girls’ recap. This is even worse than the guys’ recap, since the girls are worse than the guys.

The first girl who is safe is Brooke. No surprise to me. Next up is Syesha. This one I wasn’t sure about.

Next is Kady, who is out. Also, no surprises there. The down side is, of course, as always, that she now has to sing that same song she sang so terribly yesterday. Why do they put us through this torture? She is not better tonight. It’s nice how all the girls (except the ones who are already safe and don’t care anymore) gather around her at the end to show their support. Not really. Actually, the show might go faster if they just kept in their seats and moved it along.

Back to the guys. David Hernandez is safe! What??!! He won’t make the Top 10. Not if I have anything to say about it. Michael is also safe. Oh, really?

Luke is out, which is no surprise. Can he please not sing? As he finishes, my husband says, I’m glad that song is gone. I’m just glad Luke is gone. Sorry, but he’s just painful to listen to. At least his family loves him.

So that leaves only Danny and Chikezie. My husband likes Chikezie and I like Danny. So, who is out?

Back to the chicks. Ramiele is safe. I wasn’t sure about her, but I’m kinda glad. I just hopes she kicks it up a notch. Next is Carly, who is safe, of course. *cough* plant *cough*

Amanda is safe!! Yay!! I’m glad about that. So it’s down to Kristy and Asia’h. But we’ll find out after the break. My husband likes both of them and I like neither. Kristy Lee is in the Top 12. That is very hard to believe, since Asia’h is about a thousand times better than Kristy. I guess looks count for more than talent. Why do I keep forgetting that I’m watching American Idol and it’s all fixed? Why do I keep watching?? The only good part about it is that I don’t have to listen to Kristy murder a Journey song again. Oh, and that I won’t have to keep typing Asia’h’s name with that hyphen in it for my reviews.

Now we are back to Danny and Chikezie. Wow, that was a surprise. It would have been more interesting with Danny, but I’m OK with Chikezie. I do think this show is fixed, though, cause a world where someone like Chikezie has more fans than someone like Danny isn’t a world I want to live in.

So here is the Top 12:

David Cook
David Archuleta
Jason Castro
Brooke White
Syesha Mercado
David Hernandez
Michael Johns
Ramiele Malubay
Carly Smithson
Amanda Overmyer
Kristy Lee Cook
Chikezie

I think the reason I can’t seem to keep these all these interchangeable chicks straight on American Idol is that I’m confusing them with a totally different set of interchangeable chicks on America’s Next Top Model. I blog about that show over at watchingcw.com. I am trying, but for some reason, I can’t seem to remember who’s who and who I like or don’t like. It’s possible that I don’t like any of them that much.

As the Top 8 girls perform this week, I’m going to do my best to really pay attention to what makes each one of them different from all the others. Well, Amanda is pretty obviously only Amanda, but I mean other than her. Amanda may be hanging around because Vote For The Worst loves her, but I also think that some people might just vote for her cause she’s interesting. In an unusual way.

So here we go. This is American Idol. Oh, I care even less about the girls’ embarrassing moments than I did about the guys’. And honestly, for most of them, I’d call what they are doing right here pretty embarrassing.

Paula did cause a really bad hairdo back in the ’80s. But we can forgive her for it because she’s also given us lots of loopy dialogue over the last few years.

Asia’h - I Wanna Dance with Somebody, Whitney Houston. The judges never like you to take on Whitney unless you’re gonna be awesome. This was not awesome. It was just OK. It was a little karaoke for me. Her voice was nice, and she hit the notes, but where was the wow? As sometimes happens, the judges like it better than I do. Except for Simon, cause he’s honest. Its doubtful she’s going anywhere, though.

Kady - Who Wants To Live Forever, Queen. Please don’t sing Freddie. No one can be Freddie. Only Constantine ever came close. Also, this was the Katherine McPhee version and I never thought I’d hear myself say this, but Katherine actually did it better. Was even one note in tune? Are the judges tone deaf?? Do they just want this chick in the Top 12 for some reason? Don’t we already have enough random blonds in this competition? I hope Simon’s right. I hope she’s in trouble.

Amanda - Hate Myself for Loving You, Joan Jett. Why does this chick look so normal in her videos, but so amazingly weird when she’s performing? Actually, tonight, she looks really pretty, so maybe I spoke too soon. This was a much better song choice for her. Except for that weird little screamy thing in the middle. And that kinda off last note. Hey, at least she’s fun. No, really, she did a very good job. I like Amanda, and so does VFTW. I hope she stays in for a while.

Carly - I Drove All Night, Cyndi Lauper. I’ve never heard this song before in my life. Before tonight, I would have said I knew every song from the 80’s. This song, I don’t know. Well, I might have recognized it, if it had sounded anything at all like the original song from the 80’s and not the Celine Dion version. I was so distracted by that, that I didn’t really even pay attention to her singing. I think she was OK. So if this chick could sing the phone book and sound good, as the judges commented, why didn’t her CD sell more copies? So anyway, I had to go and listen to this song, as sung originally by Cyndi Lauper and then I listened to the Celine Dion version. I figured out what really makes it sound so different to me. Cyndi caresses the song, Celine and Carly slap it around. I’ve never been a Celine fan either, and I wish she would stop taking good songs and beating them up.

Kristy - Faithfully, Journey. Kristy, I have a little advice for you, don’t tell people you had your own dog bowl to drink from. Also, telling that story is more embarrassing than having it actually happen when no one knows about it. As for the singing, it was bad (I’ve tried to think of another word, but “bad” really sums it up) on the high notes and bad on the low notes, and the ones in the middle weren’t much better. Sorry, judges, that could not be a country hit. At least not the way she sang it.

Ramiele - Against All Odds, Phil Collins. She did OK. I wanted it to be better than it was. I really like her, but somehow she’s just not shaping up to be as good as I thought she was. This wasn’t a good week to be just OK.

Brooke - Love Is a Battlefield, Pat Benatar. She’s really good. She could record that today and it would be a hit. She totally made that song contemporary, no matter what Randy said, and she made it completely her own. Some people just have it, and Brooke has it.

Syesha - Saving All My Love For You, Whitney Houston. Look, no matter how good you are, you aren’t Whitney. Her vocals were good, but I thought the high note was just a little weak. Which is what comes from trying to be Whitney. No one ever is. All that said, she did a good job and definitely deserves to be in the Top 12.

Honestly, I hardly care who goes home from this group. If I was picking, my bottom three would be Kady, Kristy and Ramiele. My top two would be Brooke and Syesha. And then Amanda, cause I just like her.

As for the judges, either they are on drugs, or this show is fixed. Or, you know, both. They spent so much time babbling about their own crap, they didn’t really ever give any kind of constructive criticism, and just seemed to say whatever they were already gonna say, based on who the like and who they don’t like, regardless of whether the person did well or did really badly. OK, I know this happens every year. It just annoys me. Why do we need these judges again?

This is it, we’re down to the Top 8 guys on American Idol and about to weed out two to make the male half of this year’s Top 12. That’s really the goal these days, cause once you make the Top 12, someone might notice you. Actually, Top 10 is even better, cause you also make the tour. Think about it for a minute, can you name anyone from last year’s Top 24 that didn’t make the Top 12. Can you do it? If you can, answer this question. Where is that person now?

Going into this week, I’ve been a little worried about my fav, Jason Castro, cause they are making him sing without the guitar, which is where he seems really comfortable. But I have faith in him. Also, maybe the news about David Hernandez will mean that he has to be eliminated this week, which will save a spot on the top 12 for someone who might not do as well tonight. I’m not saying this show is fixed or anything. *ahem*

I’ve also been reading lots of spoilers about what songs they were going to sing. I love 80’s music, cause that’s my era. But when I saw the songs they were predicting, I was a little worried. It wasn’t as bad as it might have been, but I still think there were better songs they could have chosen.

So here we go, Ryan, looking as cute as ever, launches us right into the singing. Each contestant discusses their most embarrassing moment. Since that is also a question they asked them for their profile on the AI boards, I’ve already read about it all. I didn’t care much then, either. Embarrassment embarrasses me, even when it happens to other people.

Luke - Wake me Up Before You Go-Go, Wham. He’s so gone. Didn’t anyone tell him that to sing a song with the word “go” in it wasn’t a good idea? Poor Luke, he’s still really hot, but his vocals are not right. In any way at all. It’s very weak and just a little sad. Even his phrasing seems off and he messed up the words a little. (My husband insists I’m the only one who notices stuff like that, cause I know all the words. It’s an illness.) In any case, I can barely watch or listen to Luke at all tonight. Why did the judges pick this guy to be in the Top 24 again? *sigh* Bye, bye, fodder guy.

David A. - Another Day in Paradise, Phil Collins. Can I say that this is one my least fav songs? I just hate all that bleeding heart whining stuff and I like singers to leave their politics at home. I did, however, call for David A. to sing Phil this week, but I thought it would be Against All Odds. And who knew little David could play piano? My, he’s so talented, and young, and cute, isn’t he? Sorry, in case you missed it, that was sarcasm. All that aside, he does a great job. I wish he didn’t breathe so much, and I thought he could have picked something better song-wise, but still he’s good. My husband says, “he’s a winner.” Personally, I’ve liked him better other weeks.

Danny - Tainted Love, Soft Cell. It’s not a real singable song, but for all that, I thought he did a pretty good job. I like the arrangement and I thought he made it fun and interesting. I think he’s definitely got a spot on the Top 12. I love the way his hair has the purple to match the shirt, too. The kid has a great personality. I can’t help but like him.

David H. - It’s All Coming Back To Me Now, Pandora’s Box (At least that’s who sang it in the 80’s). His vocals are just OK. He hit some nice glory notes, but there were definitely some pitch issues. What was it that Simon said when he was finishing up? I went back and listened several times, but all I could get out of it were the words “liked” and “strip.” Did they mean for us to hear that???? The judges gave him some praise, which is good, so that when he is kicked off Thursday they can be surprised.

Michael - Don’t You Forget About Me, Simple Minds. Once again, his vocals seems pretty weak to me. What happened to the guy who sang so great in the auditions? He also sounds like he’s really reaching on the high notes. Can I also say, please, Randy, give it up about Michael Hutchence already. This kid is no Michael Hutchence. Besides, INXS already has a new lead singer, so just let it go. My husband liked it. Maybe I’m just being too hard on him, but I just expected a lot and, in my opinion, he’s not delivering. And was it wise to sing a song about forgetting him?

David C. - Hello, Lionel Ritchie. Somehow, I never thought of a rocking electric guitar and Lionel Ritchie as going together. But David did an awesome job. He made the song contemporary and could release it today. (Ooh, look, the judges agree with me!) I think he was the best of the night so far.

Jason - Hallelujah, Leonard Cohen. Very sweet and sincere sounding. I thought he did a great job and he did what they are supposed to do. He made it his own. I really love this kid. He’s definitely just always himself, which is refreshing when most of these kids are so phony and polished. I also have to say that even though I was alive in the 80’s, I don’t really recall this song from then. But I loved it on the Shrek soundtrack. My husband insists he’s never heard it at all, even though he’s seen Shrek many times. Apparently, men don’t pay attention that well.

Chikezie - All the Woman I Need. (I’m not sure who to give the credit to on this song. Whitney’s 1986 version was All The Man That I Need, which was actually a 1982 R&B hit for Sister Sledge. Chikezie seemed to be doing the 1995 Luther Vandross version.) My husband said, “that was beautiful.” I thought Chikezie’s vocals were really on. He is in the pimp spot, too, so I don’t think they want him to go. I’m not that enamoured of Chikezie, so I just don’t know. But I do think he was in the Top 3 tonight.

I keep waiting to be totally blown away by some contestant this year, by some perfectly lovely performance, but that hasn’t happened. David Cook’s take on Hello and Jason’s Hallelujah are songs I’ll remember for a while though.

I’m not really sure who’s going this week. I know who I want to go, but generally no one pays attention to me. I’d say the top 3 of the night were David Cook, Jason and Chikezie, in that order, and bottom 3 were Luke, David Hernandez and Michael.

Oh, and I did love Paula’s final comments. Yes, Paula, it was fun and nominal. Very nominal.